Tips for writing essays toefl

Hi Dominic plz tell me whats is the level of this suggest me corrections
The rising trend of an increasing number of women turning as major bread earners of the family is pervasive these days. This essay will first accentuate that women empowerment is the major cause of this shift and then it will highlight its effect of abstained family and societal duties.
Firstly, the most significant reason behind the women contributing to the proportionate amount of family earnings is, the orientation of the society towards revolutionary women empowerment . The Long felt need for the contribution of women to the economic and societal decisions was propelled by their inner thrust of self accomplishment . Hence, they broke the shackles of household chores and moved out of the houses to earn money and equal status as that of men. Moreover, this movement was further supported by the governments of various instance, reservations were made for women to occupy significant positions in public enterprises, services and other institutions.
On the other hand, this positive development in the society has resulted into more number of impoverished being considered the heart and soul of the families are more proficient in accomplishing family affairs than their male , more and more number of women moving out of the families for work has affected the family and societal bondings negatively to a considerable is evident from the fact that younger generations are now more interested in hangout with friends than attending family and social rituals.
In conclusion, while women are giving remarkable economic contribution to their families resulting in better living standards nonethless, this has led to an anomaly of a weak aberration however can be overcome through collective effort of the family members in sharing role and responsibilities, thus framing better work -life balance

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Tips for writing essays toefl

tips for writing essays toefl

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